Going alone through the darkness
There are times in life when you will have to go on alone.
Especially at times of juncture — such as leaving home for the first time, ending a close relationship, moving to a new city or changing careers — there will be stretches of time when you will have to figure things out for yourself.
And these moments are not easy.
It feels like walking through a darkening tunnel where the sunlight is fading behind you and you’re still to see the light peering in at the other end.
There’s a period when you will be walking in almost complete darkness.
And I’m here to tell you that, as scary as those moments can be, you will be okay.
You will be more than okay because you’re growing, on a process of becoming.
You’re shedding parts of you you no longer need but still haven’t built up the new skills and perspectives you now need. But you will find them.
For now, you’re naked and vulnerable.
You want to stop and go back to the safety you’ve left behind.
But you can’t.
Even if you did turn back, that part of your life is over. You wouldn’t be able to find it again.
And so you must continue.
Step by step.
Your mind filled with doubt and insecurity.
No one will give you the validation you so desperately crave because no one else is walking this path but you. It’s yours, and can only ever be yours.
So look inside yourself.
Find that validation from within. Find that nugget of self-belief that put you on this path in the first place and protect it.
Care for it.
Nurture it with actions that it can take to mean, “yes, this is me. This is who I am.”
Then keep going.
Keep feeding your belief as it grows, slowly, day by day.
Then, eventually, you will make it to the end of the tunnel.
And out of the darkness.
Till next time,
Ben
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This was both scary and soothing to read at the same time. I feel it goes along with the idea of spiritual detachment and finding inner peace by discovering our true selves. When we find it, self-realization comes, along with the tranquility and bliss we all long for. :)
I really like one particular part you wrote here: 'find the validation within and find the nugget of self‑belief and protect it'. I sometimes tend to look for both externally. Perhaps others do so as well. But your advice anchors both firmly and brings along strength, motivation and courage to persevere. Thanks for highlighting this!